Thursday, August 8, 2013
Long Distance Relationships: A Break Down
If you clicked on this blog then you're either one of a few things you're interested to know more about long distance relationships before you decide to take that step OR you're already in it and you need ways to possibly make it work or it afloat. You've come to the right place! I myself have been in one or two long distance relationships and I'll admit it wasn't all good and it wasn't all bad, but I'm here to give you the ends and outs of long distance relationships from my point of view and what helped me.
First off anyone getting into long distance relationships has to have a open mind if you do not you may want to go ahead and turn the other direction early because it's a fail before you even get started or if you're already in a long distance relationship you may want to start developing a more open mind for the sake of keeping and saving your relationship. When starting long distance relationships, there are so many things that comes to mind but I'm going to share with you a few key things that you HAVE to consider if you even wanna attempt to try being in long distance relationships. One thing that you have to first think about is how far is that person away from you? They could be 50- 5000 miles away or more whatever the distance may be you have to take into consideration how can you get to where your significant other is and how often are you able do it or even if its do able. But in all actuality sometimes those things never pop up in our head depending how much we are into a person and how quickly we just wanna jump right into because you may want it or "need" it so bad.
Just like any relationship, long distance relationships are know different the beginning stages better known as the "honeymoon" phase is pure bliss, no matter how you look it, its just amazing all the way through. This phase could go on for weeks and even months just like a relationship where distance isn't a factor. The way I look at it is simple as anything else in life and any other kinship, you get out what you put into it. Long distance relationships are no different than any other kinship when it comes to quality time you have to put in time, work and effort but maybe in more ways than you would if you were in the same city or state. Just for a quick example you may have to spend more hours on the phone together to compensate not being around each other as much as you may want to.
I have come to realize that there are some advantages to having a long distance relationship, it gives a couple a chance to actually miss each other. Although the "distance" and being away from each other during the majority of the long distance relationships is draining at times there is a flip side to that.The distance that does allow a couple to grow fond of each other, miss each other, cherish, and enjoy each other in a way that they wouldn't if the couple were constantly around each other day in and day out. Another advantage that I found to be very significant in the longevity of long distance relationships is that it builds a very strong foundation in the relationship that keeps you "in it" because let's face it being long distance you spend more hours on the phone talking, laughing, sharing jokes, sharing stories and interest, how many of us would you say in this day and time would take the time and do that with a person you see everyday?!.... I don't know of very many. By doing this you development a unconditional emotions towards the person, you connect with them intellectually, emotionally and mentally and we all know when you connect emotionally the bond is NEVER easily broken.
Does long distance relationships really work?
Absolutely long distance relationships work, if BOTH are willing to deal with what is at hand and know exactly what they are getting into early on. No, you may not know everything that you are getting into but as long as you have the basics and the jest of what it takes to maintain a healthy relationship period then you should be well on your way. Long distance relationships require a lot of effort and dedication, many people make long distant relationships work everyday.Whether it is due to deployment or any other circumstance, long distance works as long as both of you care and love each other enough to work through your pit falls and differences.
As you all continue to read my blogs you will see that I am pretty honest and straight forward or in other words "tell you like it is" I'm not one to sugar coat a lot. Coping with long distance relationships isn't easy, it gets stressful at times pending greatly on whether or not the couple has or hasn't even spent time together, physically. Come on let's be honest for a second, we all have needs physically, sexually, and emotionally and getting those things over a phone conversation, video chat can go but so far until it gets "old" and it goes but so far. But all isn't lost, coping is as simple as having great listening and communication skills with each other that's the key to coping and making the relationship work. Don't let the "distance", distance you and make you forget the reason why you made the commitment in the first place.
Yes, I said embrace it, its not going to work for you if you don't embrace it, Why get into if you're not going to embrace the fruits of your labor, right? If you follow the few simple concepts I mentioned in the article than you should be on your way to a successful long distance relationships love knows no distance, so don't deprive your heart long term happiness for the likes of a few thousand miles.
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To Your Success,
Candice "Kae Yvette" Turner